The Assassin's Monkey
by boomnitro
Summary: Mercury Black the worlds greatest assain has never met a target he couldn't kill until now.


**Thoughts are in** _ **italics**_ **. This is a fanfic for a friend of my brother who just got engaged to his boyfriend.**

One day Mercury Black was drinking at Junior's bar in Vale. He was supposed to meet his handler Emerald but ever sense she started dating that little red headed girl Ruby she hasn't made it to a prearranged meeting point and she was currently 3hrs late. He had just downed his 3rd beer when Emerald decided to show herself. "What took you so long?" asked Mercury and Emerald said, "Ruby wouldn't let me go without a goodbye kiss which turned into a quickie which turned into a not so quick quicke sorry.". "It's okay." said Mercury "I know it's hard to resist such a cute face.". "Anyway, down to business your next target is a Faunus by the name of Sun Wukong." Said Emerald. "What did he do to earn this hit" asked Mercury and Emerald replied, "He slept with several members of the Atlas government's kids both the boys and the girls.". "So, he's a player." Said Mercury while examining the photos. He then thought to himself " _I could totally see myself grinding some meat on those sweet abs of his. While we're both naked, wait what am I thinking. I'm not gay and I'm not falling for my target right."_. he then looks down and sees his giant erection and thought " _Crap I am."_. "I'll do it" he said and they then both left the bar an hour later.

 **Three months later…**

Mercury had him in his sights all he had to do now was pull the trigger except he couldn't. He then decided to go meet with his target and confess everything to him. An hour later he did confess everything to Sun except the part about his falling in love with him. Sun then asked Mercury out to dinner as a thank you for not killing me and Mercury agreed that in two days he would. Two days later Mercury was trying to figure out what to wear on his totally not a dinner date date. He finally settled for a pair of nice cargo pants (black), a nice grey t-shirt, and a nice black and grey themed jacket. He showed up to the arranged joint and joined Sun at his table where they each ordered a noodle dish one with bananas and one without bananas. He then asked out Sun for a real date sometime in the future to which sun agreed.

 **Two years later…**

It's been two years but Sun finally was going to ask his boyfriend Mercury Black the world's deadliest assassin to marry him. "So, do you think he'll like it?" asked Sun to his BFF Neptune to which he replied saying "Dude you got him a diamond ring made out of white gold, white diamonds, and grey quartz. I think he'll love it.". "If you say so bro if you say so." Said Sun. three hours later he met Mercury at their favorite diner and when it came time to pay the check Sun offered to pay it. He then pretended to drop his credit card and got down on one knee, pulled out a velvet box and said, "Mercury Black these past two years of my life have been the best I've ever had and it would make me the happiest man alive if you would marry me so what do you say?" and for a long moment Mercury was speechless, he then burst out laughing which ticked off Sun "What you think that this is funny?" Said Sun to which Mercury quickly replied "No, I don't think that it's funny but the thing is I had a similar idea." He then proceeds to pull out his own velvet box and opens it to reveal a fire opal ring in the shape of a banana set in a gold band with bananas carved into it. Mercury then gets down onto one knee and asks Sun to marry him as well to which they both replied "YES" to each other's questions.

 **6 Months later**. **..**

"This is soo boring" said Sun to his groom. To which said groom replied, "Don't worry I'll make it up to you tonight and for the rest of the Honey Moon.". He then whispered all the sweet, dirty, and nasty things that he was going to do to Sun who then proceeded to blush profusely. Three hours later they were off and let's just say that Sun was one happy man thanks to the assassin Mercury Black-Wukong.


End file.
